I ordered a copy of "Reconceiving Midwifery" today. It's a recently published book with a series of essays about midwifery in Canada. One of the essays was written by the director of the UBC Midwifery Department. It looks really good - I'm looking forward to reading it. I was tempted to order "Push: The Struggle for Midwifery in Ontario", but I refrained. I'd like to read it, but I don't want to pay for it. The UVic Library probably has a copy, though. I'll check... Nope. They have the one I ordered. Oh, well. If and when I apply to McMaster, I'll pick up a copy.

I also ordered "Baby Magic", a sort of pseudo-pagan Martha Stewart looking book for baby's first year - lots of pretty pictures which I'm a sucker for. And a wirework beading book. This last one I need to help perfect my jewelry technique, so I can offer lots more birth/doula/midwife jewelry on my website. I love putting together the bracelets and such, working out the designs, and I just need to work on my finishing techniques and it should fly. I intend to start actively advertising. Probably on Google, Sage Woman, Mothering and Midwifery Today. That should do for a start. Of course, I need a total overhaul of my website as well. I eventually want to be making a chunk of change from my online store. It'd be nice.

My shirt didn't come yet. Next week, I guess. I can't wait to wear it.

Course Arrived...

My Education and Career Planning course came yesterday, and I had a good look through. It seems to be pretty manageable. The assignments are readily doable, and the final project is only supposed to be 4-6 pages (and 8-10 hours). I'm hoping to start in the next week, organize my time and space to do it. So today, Ted and I are going to work on cleaning up the house and laundry. Oh well, I have to start somewhere.

Just Got an Email...

Just as I published my last post, I received an email - my Aspiring Midwife t-shirt has just been shipped. See? It will work out, and it will do so perfectly.

Doubt and Fear...

It's so easy to give into doubt. And fear. This morning I began to freak out about doing my practicum work. Keep in mind that I won't even be starting a practicum for 3.5-4.5 years. But still for hours this morning I let it get to me. Of course the part about practicum doesn't involve my ability to do it, but my family and how having to (possibly) relocate every four months for 20 months will affect them. It is a serious concern. Very serious. But for a while there, I let it rule it my thoughts again, and my mind wandered into the 'maybe I should pick something easier and closer so I don't have to move my family ever'.

But you know what? I didn't let it get a strangehold on me and my ambition. It will work out. And eventually, our lives will be better for me choosing this path.

Did I mention that midwives in BC have a great starting salary? ;)

Sigh... I can do it, I can do it, I can do it.

First Decision Made!

This morning I enrolled in my first course on the path. It may be considered a namby-pamby course by some, but I think it's perfect for me. It's through Thompson Rivers Uni Open Learning section. It's Career and Education Planning 12. Yes, a high school course. It will help me decide on the best way to pursue midwifery education, will help teach me time management, self-confindence, study habits, creating a CV, and involves a career planning project which of course, I will do on midwifery. I think it's simply the best choice for me at this time. I need to re-learn how to be a student, and I'm happy with my decision. It should arrive in about a week.

I ordered an "Aspiring Midwife" t-shirt through CafePress. It may seem a bit silly, but it's important to me. I know the hardest part of pursuing midwifery for me is going to be sustaining interest in the prep work to apply, ie. all the courses I need to take which are mostly irrelavent to midwifery. So, this is going to help. I also got one of SMS's 25th anniversary posters which have a lovely art print of being 'with women'. It's gorgeous and I'm going to get it boarded or framed to hang in my bedroom to inspire me.

I need lots of inspiration to succeed.

Decisions...

Well, I'm trying to decide how I want to go about applying to midwifery school. When I meet the pre-reqs, I'll apply to UBC and one of the Ontario schools. As much as I'd love to go to Seattle Midwifery School, I don't think I can really deal with living in south of the border (well, with my kids anyway). So, Canadian schools it is (or New Zealand - haven't ruled that out yet).

I need to do serious upgrading. The only decision is where, when and what to start with. I could start with upgrading high school courses (Biology 12, Chem 11 etc) or I could simply skip that and do uni transfer courses. UBC will allow you to transfer after 24 units - and the midwifery department uses those 24 to determine GPA (which would be a bonus for me). Even if I can get those 8 courses in by next April, I likely won't be accepted - but I'd like to try. I'm thinking of starting with a Child Development course and an introduction to Sociology - both of which I'm interested in. I'd also like to take some Women's Studies, English Composition, and possibly a Biology course or two to prove I could get through the A&P course.

I'd like to start through the OLA, but we'll see. I need to start soon, or there will be no hope of completing 8 courses by the deadline. I'm kind of scared, but excited as well!